Like There's No Tomorrow
by DharmaMotorPool
Summary: Dr. Emma Ford is brought to the island to work with Juliet. But what happens when her past continues to haunt her? Better yet, what will happen when she's reunited with her long lost cousin, James? OC; alternate season 2/3.
1. Redemptus

**A/N: Okay, so this idea has been swimming around in my head for some time, and I'm just now starting to put the details together. Basically, Emma Ford is James' cousin, and this story is an alternate version of seasons 2 and 3. Boone and Shannon are alive, the raft was never launched, therefore Walt was never kidnapped, and instead of using Michael to capture Jack, Kate, and Sawyer, Ben instead uses Emma to get Jack to do the surgery. Make any sense? Hopefully it will. Someday. :) Anyway, enough rambling. This first chapter is more of a prologue, really, so you can get to know Emma a little bit before I launch into the whole thing. Enjoy! Feedback is always appreciated. **

"Emma Jane Ford, this court has found you guilty of prostitution. You are hereby sentenced to 30 days in the state penitentiary, along with a $5,000 fine and a lifetime of humiliation. What say you?"

"What? No!" Emma screamed as she was dragged off to her cell, "Please, this is a mistake, this can't be happening! NO!"

She jolted awake in terror, sheathed in a cold sweat, her heart pounding. _Just a dream, Emma. It was just a dream,_ she told herself. Unfortunately, the words failed to make her feel any better. It _was_ just a dream…for now. But she knew all too well that it could very soon become a reality. Four years of selling herself to get through med school was definitely getting to her.

Now that she'd graduated and earned a spot on the staff of Mass Gen, her life was finally about to start. She could finally escape the hell that had become her reality over the past few years, but she was harboring a secret that could ruin it all in a heartbeat. She had the feeling her patients wouldn't like to be treated by someone whose back story was entitled "I Was a Harvard Hooker". As if her family's name hadn't been raked through the coals enough already.

Sleep was an impossibility after waking from that nightmare. All Emma could do was think. Think about her life, about her secrets, about the events that had led her to commit acts of such desperation…

_FLASHBACK_

"Emma! Emma! Were you aware of your father's involvement with the mob? Are you happy they caught your father's killers? How do you want them to be brought to justice?" The reporters bombarded Emma and her mother outside the courthouse, shoving microphones in their faces, obnoxiously trying to pry information that Emma wasn't willing to give. She kept her head down, clung to her mother's arm, and walked briskly to the car. It was all a hazy blur. Somewhere nearby, she heard their family's lawyer repeat, "No comment, please, leave them be". Emma felt numb. Her father had two bullets in the back of his head, how the hell did these reporters _think_ she felt? Sadistic morons.

The car door slammed, and Emma exhaled deeply, sitting back in her seat and closing her eyes the whole way home. Their Park Avenue penthouse felt empty now; the absence of her father was already weighing heavily on the former warmth of the household.

The next morning, Emma found her mother sobbing over a bowl of Kashi cereal. "They're taking it all, Emma." she said.

Emma's brow furrowed, "Who? Taking what?"

"The house, the cars, everything. The bank's taking all of it."

"Wh-what? Why?" Emma exclaimed in confusion.

"Your father owed a lot of money to a lot of people, apparently…"

"Wait, that's why you're crying right now? Not because daddy's dead, but because…we have no _money?"_

"I've already cried enough for your father, Emmaline." her mother said coldly.

"We can always get more money, mother, but we'll never get another one of daddy. I can't believe you! I always knew you were shallow, but this is a whole new low, even for you." Emma's coldness mirrored her mother's as she spoke. "Excuse me." she said in an icily disdainful tone, storming out of the house. She needed to take a walk through Central Park; that always helped to clear her head.

Emma returned a few hours later, feet sore, but head much clearer. Unfortunately, the feeling wouldn't last long.

She found her mother on the bathroom floor, an empty bottle of painkillers resting in her limp hand. "Mom? Mom! Wake up, please!" she begged, to no avail, shaking her mother's lifeless body and sobbing until she could no longer deny it. Not only was her father gone, but now her mother was, too, and it was all her fault…what the hell was she supposed to do now?

_END FLASHBACK_

Time had hardened Emma. She used to be just another Upper East Sider, just another girl with a rich daddy. She used to be carefree. Her biggest worries included "Will that cute senior ask me to formal?" and "Did I get an A on my calculus final?" She used to have so many friends she couldn't keep count, and now she was a loner. It was the only way to get by.

She'd survived four years of med school and prostitution, and now it was nearly time to begin her residency. Maybe she could finally put the past behind her once and for all. Redeem herself. Save lives. Make up for the ones she'd taken from her parents. If her father hadn't been paying all of her expenses, he'd never have owed so much money, and he wouldn't have been killed. If she'd just supported herself instead of relying on him, things would be so different now. She knew she couldn't escape what she'd done, but maybe there was still hope for her.

The day after she'd had her nightmare, just a few weeks before she was scheduled to begin her residency, fate intervened, in the form of a man named Richard Alpert. He told her he was with a place called Mittelos Bioscience, in Portland. He told her that some of her Harvard professors had recommended her for their program, and it was very prestigious. Emma was intrigued, but she couldn't help but have some reservations. "Mr. Alpert, with all due respect...I don't think I'm quite what you're looking for."

"On the contrary. I think you're _exactly _what we're looking for, Emmaline. What do you say? Just give it a few months, and if you don't like it, we'll fly you back home."

Emma paused. Maybe this was a good idea. Maybe she needed to get as far away from the east coast as circumstances would allow, and this was her shot. It could be a new life, a new beginning. A _real _fresh start. "I'm in."


	2. Simulo

**A/N: Okay…so this chapter ended up going in a direction that even I didn't expect it to. It's totally not my fault…blame the muse. :)**

Emma woke up feeling dizzy. That orange juice tranquilizer really packed a punch…

Groggily, she climbed up the sub's ladder and stepped out into the sunlight, shielding her eyes from the unusual brightness. "Not in Portland," she muttered to herself with a snort, "Doesn't even begin to cover it."

A man was making his way down the dock towards her. He wore spectacles and was a little…creepy-looking, was her first instinct. His eyes were a little buggy. She smiled anyway. "Hello, Dr. Ford, I'm Benjamin Linus," he said, extending his hand to help her down from the sub's roof, then shaking her hand. "It's wonderful to have you here, we're so excited to work with you."

"Oh, um, thank you, Mr. Linus. I hope I can live up to your expectations," she said with a more genuine smile. After all the trouble her professors had gone through to get her into this program, she didn't want to let them, or these people, down. "Mr. Alpert said something about a problem with pregnancies…I'm not really an expert on that kind of thing. I mean, I just graduated med school, but-"

"No need to worry, Emmaline, I'm sure you're more than qualified to help us. You're special. If you weren't, you wouldn't be here. And please, call me Ben," he offered with what she noted was a mildly creepy smile. Like there was more behind her being there than he was letting on.

"Please," she mimicked his offer, "Call me Emma." she insisted, following him down the dock.

"You'll be rooming with one of our other doctors, at least for the time being. If you find you enjoy your time here and want to stay, we'll set you up with your own house." Ben explained.

"That sounds nice. This place is so beautiful. Not like New York."

"No, definitely not like New York," he agreed with a soft chuckle, "I think you'll like it here, Emma. I hope you do. Oh! Speak of the devil, there's your roommate now." he said. Emma noted the excitement in his voice as he walked ahead of her, making a beeline for the tall, blonde woman who would apparently be her new roommate. "Juliet! This is Emmaline – I'm sorry, Emma. Emma Ford. You'll brief her on what she needs to know, I trust?"

The blonde, Juliet, shook Emma's hand and nodded in response, "Of course," she said, offering a warm smile. Emma felt better about this situation already. Juliet seemed so nice, much less creepy than Ben. "Come on, Emma, I'll show you your room. We've already had your things brought there.

"I'll leave you to it, then," Ben said with another one of his cryptic smiles.

"We'll meet you later for dinner." Juliet said. Ben nodded and walked off, and Juliet turned back to Emma, "Don't mind him, he's just a little…intense." she explained with a chuckle.

Emma laughed along, "I'll say. Are his eyes always that…"

"Shiny? Yeah, kinda." Juliet interrupted, both of them laughing again. Maybe this would be fun, after all, despite Ben and his creepy, shiny, bug eyes.

_x x x_

Once Juliet had helped Emma unpack her things and shown her around the house, the duo sat on the couch with iced teas, talking and laughing like they were already old friends. Emma was already starting to forget about all the troubles she'd left behind back home. "I don't get much for company around here, you know. I mean, there's Amelia, but she goes to bed so early…" Juliet said with a soft chuckle, sipping her tea.

Emma smiled, "Any cute guys around here? I mean, you know, Ben's great, if you go for the whole eye thing, but…" she said, both laughing again.

"Well…I don't know, not many are that close to your age."

"What about Richard? Those eyes…_those_ eyes are hot. Is he like, punk?"

"Punk?" Juliet asked, brow furrowed in confusion.

"Yeah, you know, cause of the eyeliner thing. Is he like, into rock and roll or something? Does he play in a band?"

Juliet laughed and shook her head, "No. That's not eyeliner. It's just the way his eyes are. I know," she said, catching Emma's disbelieving look, "But it's true. I promise."

"So speaking of Ben…he likes you, huh?" she asked, smirking at the chance to gossip again. It had been _years_.

"Wh-what…do you mean?" Juliet asked, obviously not needing any clarification.

"You know. He's got a little crush," she said with a chuckle, "Seriously, Juliet, he ran up to you like a little puppy back there. You've got him completely whipped."

Juliet snorted at the comment, "I hardly doubt anyone could ever get Benjamin Linus _whipped_, much less me."

"Much less you? Come on, you're seriously hot, and he…probably hasn't gotten any in like, 20 years." she said, laughing, her comment nearly causing Juliet to spit out her mouthful of iced tea.

The blonde laughed, "Okay, you're probably right about the second bit," she consented.

"I know I am. About _both_ bits. Fuck, I wish _I _was a tall, blonde bombshell." she said with a chuckle. She noticed Juliet blush slightly. "You know who'd really like you? My cousin, James. He could use someone like you. Classy. Gorgeous. Smart. He tends to always go for those really trailer-trashy girls. You know, the ones with the _New_ _Joisey_ accents and way too much makeup," she said, shaking her head, "At least, he used to. I mean, I haven't seen him in a few years."

Juliet just nodded, though it seemed like she wasn't really hearing what Emma was saying. "We should really get ready. Ben will be expecting us soon." She said with a smile.

_x x x_

Dinner with Ben wasn't any less awkward than Emma had expected, but at least he managed not to jump Juliet's bones right in front of her, like Emma could tell he wanted to_. Sheesh, this guy has some serious pent-up sexual frustration…_ she thought to herself, restraining a chuckle. He was twitchy, and his eyes kept wandering to the blonde's chest. Emma finally couldn't help herself and let out a soft burst of laughter.

"Something funny, Em?" Juliet asked with an amused-looking sideways grin, obviously catching on to the reason behind Emma's laughter.

"Nothing, I just…was thinking of something. Sorry," she said, smirking back at Juliet.

"How was the meal? I didn't know if you'd like rabbit, but it's one of my favorites." Ben said, seemingly oblivious to the looks exchanged between the two women.

"Oh no, it's great, thanks. I haven't eaten this well in…a _really_ long time," she said with an appreciative laugh.

"Good to hear." Ben said, his smile making her slightly uneasy. "Juliet, you can head home. I'd like to talk to Emma for a while, if that's alright. Fill her in on how things will go tomorrow."

Juliet nodded, "I'll see you at home," she told Emma with a smile that said, _you know where to find me if you need me…_

"So," Ben began after Juliet closed the door behind herself, "You and Juliet seem to be getting along famously already. That's what I like to see. Good chemistry between our doctors always helps."

"Yeah, Juliet's great," Emma agreed whole-heartedly, "It's been a long time since I really had someone I could call a friend." she admitted.

Ben nodded, "I do suppose being a high-class call girl would hinder that," he mused.

Emma's eyes widened, "What?" she said, dumbfounded.

"Emmaline, we do a lot of research on the people we bring here. It's necessary, we have to know everything we can about those who come to work with us. You understand." He paused, seeing the look of horror on her face, "Don't worry, only Juliet and I know. We're not judging you for your actions, that's not our place. Like I said before, you're special," he said, stepping closer to her. "I was hoping you could do me a favor, however. In exchange for my discretion."

Emma stared blankly, though she had a feeling she knew what he wanted to ask of her.

"I need you to lend me your services. Just for the night."

There it was. She thought she'd escaped that world, but it had crept up on her once again, even thousands of miles away from where she'd been. Ben was making it clear that she'd _never_ escape it, not if she didn't give in to him now. Just this one last time. Then she could put it behind her. Then it would be over. Just once more. She'd done this so many times; what difference would this make? What was one more client, really?

If she didn't rationalize, she'd never be able to follow through. Just one more.

"You can pretend I'm Juliet if you want to," she softly consented, causing a micro-expression of shock on Ben's face. He remained silent, stepping up to Emma and pressing his lips to her neck. She inhaled sharply and closed her eyes; his lips were cold against her skin. She went numb.

_x x x_

It was over nearly as quickly as it had begun. He'd called out Juliet's name, but it hadn't bothered her. She was used to men calling her by any name but her own after all those years in the business. He was a gentle lover, she'd admit, but aside from that, _severely_ inexperienced, and not terribly generous. She hadn't figured he would be, but just the same. It was a job, and she'd played along and given him the release she'd bargained his silence for.

At least now, perhaps, he'd quit looking at Juliet like he was about to eat her alive. It had already been getting on her nerves, and she'd only known the man a day. She didn't know how Juliet had dealt with it for three years.

"I should get going," Emma said, after lying with him for a while.

"Yes, you should," Ben agreed, "Goodnight, Emmaline. Thank you for the favor."

She nodded and climbed out of bed, redressing herself quickly and running her fingers through her mussed hair. _Now_ it was behind her. _Now_ she could forget.

Sadly, she knew that from now on, every time she looked at Benjamin Linus, she would be reminded of what she was. Of what she had done to get where she was. Of why she'd had to do it. It would never really go away.

But she could keep pretending.


End file.
